One of the best posts I have read during these months of preparation for our boys' homecoming is entitled "A letter to read before we play."
In it, the adoptive parents celebrate the soon homecoming of their children and express gratitude to those friends and family members who have walked beside them in this journey, recognizing as well God's sovereignty throughout their adoption process.
Then, they share some excellent information regarding bonding/attachment and how that process has been "interrupted" for a child living in an orphanage. The child now needs to heal and rebuild and must do so within the structure and safety of his new family environment. The greatest way extended family members and friends can support the child in this process is by setting physical boundaries and always redirecting the child to his new parents during the initial days and months of transition.
I hope to draft a similar letter to our church family here in Chile, which has lovingly supported us in prayer and faithful concern for our sons these many months. The Chilean culture is very warm and it is quite normal for babies to be passed from one doting woman to another during the course of the morning service; however, this is exactly what can confuse our sons as to who their new forever mommy/daddy is. I pray that our boys' transition will be quick and complete so that soon they can enjoy all the love everyone wishes to lavish on them! But in the meantime, we will try to be wise and careful and seek the very best for our precious little boys.
In it, the adoptive parents celebrate the soon homecoming of their children and express gratitude to those friends and family members who have walked beside them in this journey, recognizing as well God's sovereignty throughout their adoption process.
Then, they share some excellent information regarding bonding/attachment and how that process has been "interrupted" for a child living in an orphanage. The child now needs to heal and rebuild and must do so within the structure and safety of his new family environment. The greatest way extended family members and friends can support the child in this process is by setting physical boundaries and always redirecting the child to his new parents during the initial days and months of transition.
I hope to draft a similar letter to our church family here in Chile, which has lovingly supported us in prayer and faithful concern for our sons these many months. The Chilean culture is very warm and it is quite normal for babies to be passed from one doting woman to another during the course of the morning service; however, this is exactly what can confuse our sons as to who their new forever mommy/daddy is. I pray that our boys' transition will be quick and complete so that soon they can enjoy all the love everyone wishes to lavish on them! But in the meantime, we will try to be wise and careful and seek the very best for our precious little boys.
1 comment:
Thanks for your comment on my blog. I often wonder if anyone reads it. So far about 18 months since your dossier arrived in Haiti? Wow, sounds wonderful!
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