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Friday, October 23, 2009

Taking a Break

Edited to add: After reading this post, I received the following note from a friend. I wanted to share it because I think it is so true. Thank you for your continued prayers.
Steph, I just finished reading your blog update. It came to mind
that the difficulty of adoptions in Haiti, as well as the
illness and emotional and spiritual confusion,may very well be
due to spiritual oppression there. I pray that God will act
mightily on behalf of your boys and Story Ivey to free them
from the oppression and set them in permanent families who will
help draw them to Himself. I'm sure the enemy of our souls is
not excited about these adoptions, so we must stand against him.
Now that most of the contents of my Haiti journal have been spilled out onto this blog, I find myself at a loss for words and most of all struggling with the many emotions that always follow a visit to our boys.

To be honest, finding out that Story Ivey was so sick today almost put me over the edge. I was in tears as I questioned why nothing can be easy in the context of Haitian adoptions. Going to pick up your child should be a happy time, not a time of finding out that she is so very ill. Sometimes it feels like the hits just keep coming.

In the midst of feeling utterly overwhelmed and short on the patience and love that my other family members deserve, I realized that I need to take another break from this blog. I have heard nothing yet as to our MOI status but know that our coordinator knows that we are waiting for word; when she hears something, we'll heard something. Until then I need to step away from reading and writing (and obsessing) and spend some time being renewed quietly in God's presence. Prior to going on my trip I felt His presence very closely and actively in my heart and I want to return to that place in our relationship. To be honest, it was hard to hear Him amidst the emotions and challenges of being in Haiti and I need to be still and listen for His voice once again.

Thank you so much for the love and support so many of you have expressed towards our family. It truly means a lot to know that not only are we not alone, but we and our boys are loved and prayed for by so many - even people we have never met. God bless each of you.


Deborah said...

I love you, my Steph...and I am praying for you and yours. Keep listening...God's voice is worth it.


Dale said...


sea salt MOSAIC said...

I understand. Praying for you my friend.

Amanda said...

I understand that feeling of where do I go from here?? Only to God. Only to God. May He strengthen and sustain you in newer stronger ways...

praying for quick MOI exits for us all.

sheri wiebe said...

Here's hoping little Story gets the help she needs. And as to your thought about your other children needing you...sometimes I get so wound tight about our adoption I need to pray, "help me enjoy my chidren". Playing games, reading to or taking walks with our children can be very healing and comforting to our emotions sometimes. Hang in there!!

Terri Fisher said...

The note you added was exactly what I was thinking, too. I, too, am praying specifically for God to intercede on the behalf of the Christian families who are trying to free their children from a place of real spiritual bondage. I'm convinced that has something to do with all the troubles, too. We love you!