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Sunday, January 10, 2010

Wandering Thoughts

Last night, I couldn't fall asleep. I kept imagining what it will be like to see my boys again, this time for the first time knowing that I'm not saying hello just to say goodbye again in a few days. I kept wondering what it will be like to hold them and know that I am holding them for good!

There have been so many thoughts running through my mind these past 48 hours. I've considered what and how much to write on this blog, knowing that forward movement for one family is often a heartwrenching reminder to other waiting families of how unfair and unpredictable this whole process is.

But having shared all the journey thus far, it seems only natural to keep journaling as we go. I know I've been disappointed sometimes to follow a family's adoption story only to have it end abruptly just when it gets really exciting! On the other hand, I have been encouraged by those who share the details of those final days apart and those first days together because it helps me to know what we might expect as well.

I commented to my husband on Friday that there is nothing more soul-shattering than being separated from your child. It gave me pause to think of how God willingly chose 33 years of separation from His beloved Son ... for us. I know the Bible says that "a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day" but somehow I don't think that in this case those 33 years slid by like 33 days for the Heavenly Father. He must have felt every agonizing one of them. What an unbelievable sacrifice! My husband loves the modern hymn "How Deep the Father's Love for Us." My heart is stirred by these words as I consider them tonight:
How deep the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure
That he should give his only son, to make a wretch his treasure
How great the pain of searing loss, the Father turned his face away
As wounds which mar the chosen one, bring many sons to glory

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing everything I am so excited for you. We are adopting a little girl also from Haiti my husband is there this week seeing her and doing stuff at the orphange. Please keep us informed of it all.

Anonymous said...

Hi,

I've been following your blog for a while but I never posted a comment until today. Praise the Lord that the this seems to be coming to an end. The birth parent interview for my daugther's adoption happened last week. I pray that I to will hear something this week from the visa office as well. I will continue to keep you in my prayers.

Lena Wright said...

please keep sharing. Praying that your family is moving on to the next chapter in this story....and soon!!

Rebekah said...

What a great reminder of what God has done for us!

Erin said...

Yes! I am convinced that if we purpose to look the Lord will grant us a glimpse of the gospel in ALL that He ordains...the beautiful hope we have in ALL things. Praying for you to be soft to the Lord and to have sweet times anticipating the next few weeks :) Thank you Lord for your redeeming work in this family!!!

BSC said...

Forward movement is always good!!!Absolutely share God's goodness in the final journey of bringing your boys from Haiti to home.

Blessings,
Beth